‘I feel incredibly sad, a sadness deep inside. It’s almost overwhelming, a heaviness inside my chest that I carry all the time, if only I could cry.’ ‘I’m sad and that’s my normal sad.’ Do you recognise these words? Maybe you’ve written or voiced something similar? They’re from my journal, written in late Feb/early March 2016 a few days before I attended a Rising Strong workshop in Vegas. At that time I was doing absolutely everything I could to keep all the grief I was carrying in the box I’d created because I believed it was the right thing to do. Let’s just say, it wasn’t working. That workshop was the beginning of my healing journey and where I started to release some of the sadness I was holding. It was the first time I cried in public and when I realised how much we feel emotions in the body. As I wrote at the time; ‘emotions, we feel them in our body, they have a signature.’ (Who knew??) Looking back I hardly recognise the Lesley who wrote those words. That Lesley was afraid of feeling her grief because she ‘knew’ bottling everything up was the best thing to do. She was largely numb; sadness was her norm and there was very little joy in her life. And now on 8TH March 2019 at 6.22 am, exactly 3 years later I wrote these words during a yoga retreat in India: ‘Never in a million years did I ever expect that … Read moreWhat’s the link between a water bottle, a dragon, a swing chair and a stone?
I hear and feel the crack in my ankle as I crash to the ground. ‘Are you Okay?’ Roger asks. ‘NO’ I get up slowly up and hobble gingerly to … Read moreFrom sprained ankle to heart in three steps
My first brush with the pain of loss I’ll never forget my first real brush with the pain of loss. It was after our fourth IUI failed when my tectonic … Read moreReflections on Grief and Feeling by Sarah Chamberlin @Infertility Honesty
I’m going to dive straight in with some bad news: You’re grieving. I’m sorry, but you are. I’m guessing that you’ve got that sinking feeling and a ‘no.. ‘ … Read moreThree ways to ignore grief (and what to do instead)
It’s not every day that your life experience is the same as a member of the Royal Family, but I breathed a huge sigh of relief when I listened to … Read moreThank you Prince Harry – that’s my story too
Guest post by 40AndEverythingAfter I finally gave up on having a family 8 years ago. We had been trying for a baby for 5 years and, after 3 failed IVF … Read moreRelease & Renewal – Reflections & Wellbeing Through Writing
It feels to me that the world is very strange at the moment. There’s so much anxiety, stress and anger on both sides of the Atlantic; friends and families are … Read moreTaking time out to be grateful for what we have
I had always warmly anticipated motherhood, yet it wasn’t to be. I had always warmly anticipated motherhood, yet it wasn’t to be. At 31 I realised I wasn’t to become … Read moreOther than Mother – Guest post by Kamalamani