‘I feel incredibly sad, a sadness deep inside. It’s almost overwhelming, a heaviness inside my chest that I carry all the time, if only I could cry.’ ‘I’m sad and that’s my normal sad.’ Do you recognise these words? Maybe you’ve written or voiced something similar? They’re from my journal, written in late Feb/early March 2016 a few days before I attended a Rising Strong workshop in Vegas. At that time I was doing absolutely everything I could to keep all the grief I was carrying in the box I’d created because I believed it was the right thing to do. Let’s just say, it wasn’t working. That workshop was the beginning of my healing journey and where I started to release some of the sadness I was holding. It was the first time I cried in public and when I realised how much we feel emotions in the body. As I wrote at the time; ‘emotions, we feel them in our body, they have a signature.’ (Who knew??) Looking back I hardly recognise the Lesley who wrote those words. That Lesley was afraid of feeling her grief because she ‘knew’ bottling everything up was the best thing to do. She was largely numb; sadness was her norm and there was very little joy in her life. And now on 8TH March 2019 at 6.22 am, exactly 3 years later I wrote these words during a yoga retreat in India: ‘Never in a million years did I ever expect that … Read moreWhat’s the link between a water bottle, a dragon, a swing chair and a stone?
It’s been almost a month since my last blog when I encouraged you not to start new things and set resolutions but, instead to follow nature, be still and direct … Read moreThe challenges of following my own advice
As I started to write I realised this is my 150th blog, so what better time to look back and consider what I’ve learned during the almost 5 ½ years … Read more150 blogs later and it all boils down to one question
On 25th July 2018 IVF is 40; it’s the 40th birthday of Louise Brown, the first IVF baby. Latest figures suggest that at least 6 million babies have been born … Read moreIVF is 40, forgotten voices speaking out.