This will most likely be my last blog as, after 11 years, 225 blogs & a book I’m running out of words. And if I needed proof, I really couldn’t decide what to write. Today (18th June 2024) is Finding Joy’s 6th birthday & in a quest for inspiration I read through my journal from the time she was published & these words really jumped out: ‘Maybe it was all about love, Maybe I did love myself enough to do the work & ask questions, Perhaps that was the case all along.’ To be honest reading them was quite emotional (especially as they’d slipped my mind) & I spent some time pondering everything I’ve done over the past few years. The phrase, “Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.” (Søren Kierkegaard) popped into my mind & I realised the one thing; the big thing I’ve learned (am still learning) is the importance of self-love. Everything I’ve done flowed from self-love Looking back, I see that everything I did flowed from self-love. It propelled me to ask for help, to do the ‘work’ to process my childless grief & the loss of both parents, it encouraged me to explore & to follow my curiosity, and most importantly it enabled me to be confident about who I am, tell my story & find my joy. This realisation was quite a shock as, although I touched on self-love in Finding Joy, it wasn’t something I’d consciously considered & … Read more
The Next Happy, Interview with Tracey Cleantis
You know when you sometimes you read a book and it grabs you by the throat and says ‘this is important,’ well Tracey’s book, ‘The Next Happy: Let Go of … Read more
Two ways to ease through Mother’s Day
At long last Spring is here and the world seems a bit more positive, the days are getting longer and the garden’s starting to come to life. It’s the time … Read more
Had enough of the winter blues? How gratitude can help.
It’s almost the end of February, the days are getting longer and the garden’s starting to grow. You think it’s time to be more optimistic and positive but you can’t … Read more
How do you describe yourself when you’re childless?
Amanda felt stuck. She’d always wanted to be a mother. Her mind knew that it wasn’t to be, but her heart hadn’t caught up yet. She’d been focused on trying … Read more
5 ways to slay the Dementor
Remember when grief and sadness last had their grip on you? When it felt like the Dementor from Harry Potter had drained all the peace, hope, and happiness from you … Read more
How do you know which way to go?
Every day, many times every day, you come to a fork in the road and you get to choose which path to take. This article describes the two paths as … Read more
The one thing to help you at Christmas
Over the past couple of weeks I’ve written various tips on how you can get through Christmas and I’ve kept the most important until last. My guess is that you’ve … Read more
What’s the link between Christmas parties & pass the parcel?
Let me guess; you’re dreading the work Christmas party because you know everyone will be talking about their children or grandchildren and you’ll feel inadequate because you can’t join in. … Read more
3 ways to take control at Christmas
Let me guess, Christmas is fast approaching and your stress is building. Everywhere you go there’s Christmas music, and ‘happy family’ adverts seem to leap out at you from the … Read more
Is your heart a museum to grief?
You know that feeling you get when you read something and it’s being punched in the solar plexus? Well the piece below by Elizabeth Gilbert did this for me and … Read more
Helpful books – Swimming by Enza Gandolfo
When you’re not sure which way to turn, there’s so much solace to be found in the written word and especially when the story parallels your own experience. A couple … Read more
It’s good that we don’t have children
A couple of weeks ago I heard myself say these words, they sort of came out on their own and took me by surprise. My first reaction was to consider … Read more
Three ways to be more open about being childless
The ONE thing most women who connect with me find really hard (or even impossible) is to be open about why they don’t have children. Some say that keeping it … Read more
Men and Women discussing childlessness
A few weeks ago when recording an interview with Viv Oyolu we touched on how different the journey is for men. Viv had the great idea to facilitate a discussion … Read more
How to improve your life in 15 minutes.
You know that your life can change for the worse in an instant; you’ve received a call that turned your world upside down, maybe the one that told you you … Read more
